ROX-TV’s Strain Review is back. Tonight we look at San Fernando Valley Cookies, Strawberry Smiggles, and Animal Face. We smoke, discuss the experience, and keep it mellow. Join us!

Welcome back to the ROX-TV website. Before we get moving, I’d like to thank the returning readers for coming back. No one has to be here, so it’s cool that you choose to be. As everyone is aware, at the ROX-TV website, we enjoy talking about movies, music, food, strains, concerts, artists, poets, and shit that makes no sense at all. We got a taste of everything, so set up shop and poke around. There really is something for everyone. But what if I’m special and unique and the world just doesn’t understand me? Well, Johnny Cakes…don’t be so vain. We understand the weirder side of life here and that means Johnny Cakes, we see you. The content will reflect that. That goes for Sunshine Suzy, Crazy Bilbo, and the rest of the day trippers. You’re among friends. Everyone is unique and valued here. Everyone gets a say. If only the rest of the world would catch up, we’d be doing alright. Fuck it. We are doing fine.

So tonight, we are here to talk about one of the underground’s staple crops…Marijuana. I know…the story line is familiar and other than some new sounding strains, who cares? I dig that so we are going to try something different tonight. I’ve decided to review the strains while trying to watch a shitty movie. I want the testing to be true, so as the THC slowly reconfigures my thought process, I will let the winds take me. Sounds really dangerous right?  Well it’s not. I drift and float all the time…and it usually feels pretty silky. So going forward, just know that I’m going to push it a bit, and leave in the dialogue. The effects of the weed should come through in the writing for better or worse. I’m actually wondering how good or terrible this piece of shit is going to turn out. Sounds nice now, but lets see how the word salad spills out. So, Ladies and Gentlemen, the time has come to shove off. Let’s go…

Strain Testing/Movie Review

Strain: San Fernando Valley Cookies

Movie: The Twilight Zone

Year: 1983

Smoke: Commencing now 

Form: Joints x many

Any movie that opens with Credence Clearwater’s “Midnight Special” is alright in my book. The opening frames show a car cruising in the dark, with two good old cats jamming inside. You might recognize Dan Ackroyd in the passenger seat. These fellas are having a good time, singing tunes, and shooting the shit. It looks fun, although I can’t remember very many times where I sang with my friends with that much passion. But this is a movie and if they weren’t singing, there would have had to been some more dialogue. I think the Credence opener works well and believe it or not…this opening scene rings true to me. I remember going on “Sunday Drives” or a “ride” when I was little. Back then it was not uncommon to hit the road and go see what there was to see. It’s not like anyone had cell phones, internet, or any other technology to get in the way.

Just good old fashioned booze cruises and “back roading”. In some parts of the state, I’m sure the practice is alive and well. I’ve done it recently (as in maybe a few times towards the end of the last decade, when I drank a lot. Now, it’s not really possible because of where I’m at in life. I try to smoke grass only and booze cruising with the kids is a no-no. Maybe if I was on Bois Blanc Island, where the speed limit never exceeds 25mph (entire island) and the only cop was there in the Summer months, working on that second retirement. Maybe there, but not downstate or in the UP. You have to find the liminal space in between for the last of the cool shit. Literally.

Strain Update: Not bad, smoking mostly pretty almost good. Periodically the smoke from the joint in my mouth floats near my eyes while I type and I am momentarily blinded. Fucking smoke. How can a little smoke in the eye hurt so bad in the most random times? Oh well. I’ll probably forget that soon. Nothing else to report, other than pleasant vibes.

The tape that the boys were jamming out with suddenly gets eaten by the MACHINE. This was not just a funny movie sequence but based on real life. The tape decks in older cars were known to chew the tapes to hell. Although I have flashbacks of junky cars (because that’s what we were rocking, no trust fund here. This was the era of the $500 dollar car and my family always had one. Usually, a big ass green or blue Impala that could fit an army. When I was a kid, we used to climb up into the back window of the car, laying on that back plank, with the glass slanting down, and one hell of a view. We were never in our seats during a car ride. No one cared back then. Society didn’t self-report or particularly listen to everything the government said. Most old people I knew had a pretty healthy distrust of the man and that remained true until the last of them passed on. These older people didn’t buy every message that came through the paper or the news, they were skeptical and educated about the world in such a way that bullshit just didn’t fly. The news could say whatever, but the old people always had one eye on the devils. I wonder when that changed? It’s been in my lifetime. Isn’t that crazy. In my lifetime, lots of things have happened and changed that never would have flown thirty years ago. Some of the shit doesn’t need to come back, especially if it divides America. We are all in this together and I truly believe that. Division equals easily controlled. Who wants to be easily controlled? Let’s rise together. It will make everything more meaningful and lasting. Rise together, it really could be that simple. No one has to sink down into the drink for the rest of us to make it. Let’s get everyone over that finish line.

Wow…I’m feeling alright, and the joint wasn’t particularly big. Besides that, I consume a lot of flower each week, so there is that to factor in. But…if we are playing by the international liminal stoner rules…technically this is the first smoke of the day, which may contribute to volume of shine I’m getting off it. I’m still impressed though. A joint hasn’t moved the scale alone in a long time. So, it was definitely grown correct. (For the record, all the gear was procured from The Barn in Burton, Michigan). I must have paused the movie to get some words down and I’ve noticed it’s still on pause. I’ve made it exactly two minutes and nine seconds into the flick. Oh wait, remember when I was talking about those $500 dollar cars my family rocked through the 1980’s in Genesee County. Part of the relevant memory just hit me.

Those cars weren’t brand new; they were older and there weren’t any regular tape decks in them. At least not many, that also worked. Our car had that 8-track deal inside, which ate 8-tracks instead of cassette tapes. For anyone under 36, 8-tracks were a form of technology, named “Stereo 8” they were magnetic tape sound recordings which were popular in the 1960’s. The Stereo 8 technology was reportedly created by a CONSORTORIUM which included different industries (HOW WEIRD, I WONDER IF THAT HAPPENS ALOT?) and players. This particular consortium included Ampex (American electronics company founded in 1944), Ford Motor Company (you know what Henry Ford did, the company was founded in 1903), Motorola (which was founded in 1928 and was a multinational communications company under Galvin Manufacturing Corp), General Motors (another no brainer, think lots of cars and Detroit/Flint), and RCA Victor Records.

Well now, that is a very interesting group of friends, who came up with a neat project. Looks like the car and music and electronic boys started drinking together. They must have been drunk because the 8-Track in my opinion fucking sucked. Granted I was younger when I first came into contact with the technology and at that point, it had already been stamped OBSOLETE (84?). They were clunky, big, and not particularly valued by society. They were sold in garage sales ten for a dollar. Why? Because they sucked. I remember going to the old record stores and discount joints, looking for a cool record or whatever. You always had to step over these pieces of shit to get inside. I know people collect them and they did bring someone some joy, it’s just a slow-moving easy target and I’m stoned. Besides I don’t think I can really hurt anyone’s feelings by dogging out an obsolete and dead tech item. The collectors only collect it because they know no one else digs it. Thats part of the appeal of collecting odd ball shit. No competition and anyone can be an expert with ease. I’m guilty of this. I collect Halloween Masks in the box. When I started, no one cared much, which kept the price down and the targets available. But with anything, when it gets hot, that all changes. I don’t think 8-Track collecting or refurbishing is coming back. That’s it.

Trying to claw my way back to the movie

It seems that the testing proved one thing. That the S.F.V.C. is pretty nice. It was able to de-rail the movie review like a train falling off the tracks in a remote location. Engine Engine Number 9……Ok. So it doesn’t look we are going to get to the other strains tonight. But the destination isn’t the important part. It’s the journey. It’s always been about the journey. I enjoyed your company tonight and I’m sure we will do it again real soon. How about tomorrow?

Signing Off,

T.R.I.K.O.L.

Liminal Vagrants

Ghost Ship 3